Is your dog “great” at daycare, but a barky lungey mess with you? Let’s talk about it!

So your dog goes to daycare but they’re a reactive hot mess when they see other dogs while on lead. Why can they socialise so well at daycare, but react so poorly and aggressively with you?

It comes as a surprise to many dog owners, but the majority of my reactivity clients have been - or are - daycare dogs. Owners think they’re doing right by their dogs giving them the best socialisation and keeping them busy, but it kicks them in the ass when these behavioural issues surface.

The unfortunate truth is MOST commercial daycares are setting dogs up to fail. As owners we need to be doing our homework and ensuring that we are sending our dogs to facilities that will actually support their behavioural wellbeing. Because:

❌ It’s not behaviourally healthy for dogs primary focus in an environment to be playing with random dogs in high arousal games.

❌ It is not healthy for dogs to be on the go the entire day - frequently with limited structured downtime and rest. They need sleep!!

❌ It is not setting anyone up for success when you jam a very large number of dogs into a small yard in a concrete warehouse or lawn desert, overseen by inexperienced staff lacking the training or resources to spot and intervene in problematic behaviours. If problems are spotted, they are frequently being underreported to dog owners in order to retain clients. Remember, what they practice is what they get good at.

❌ The types of interactions fostered by the average daycare is not a healthy type of socialisation to be exposing our puppies to, especially when they’re starting at formative ages as young as 16 weeks old or being thrown into a pen as their first exposure to other dogs as adolescents needing “socialisation”.

It is no wonder we see so many issues arising. For my dog daycare attending reactive dogs, these issues typically fall into two main camps:

🧨 1. The hyper-social FOMO dog.

They get a big kick out of interacting with other dogs. Their social scale has tipped all the way towards “I see another dog, that must mean high excitement play time” - because that’s the expectation that has been rehearsed. Then when they’re prevented from doing that by being on a leash or being told no in public, we see the equivalent to a toddler tantrum - “BUT I WANT TO GO PLAY!” 😡 While the arousal levels go off the charts and the brain disappears.

The intensity will vary depending on the dog - for some dogs (especially our working type dopamine addicts) just a small amount of high arousal play is such high value to them that it takes a lot of neutral time to balance things out. For others, it might be less valuable generally but it is rehearsed so often that the pattern develops.

😱 2. The “holy shit that’s too much, make them stay away” dog.

These guys are overwhelmed by other dogs and develop barking and lunging as a strategy to create the space they crave - because that has been the only thing that has worked. Often these dogs are reported as being “great” at daycare or dog parks because they just sit quietly in the corner fairly shut down and not causing issues, but if not advocated for by handlers (who are frequently at the start of their careers and not appropriately trained or supported) recognising the stress signs quickly become snappier and more defensive when approached by another dog.

Again, the intensity depends on the dog - it could be one really negative experience being rushed by out of control dogs at the park or it could be a lot of small negative experiences over a long duration in a daycare situation. Hence why a lot of daycare dogs “age out” by 3-4 years old in some facilities when the stress has built up and they’ve honed their space getting behaviours.

What can we do about it though? We need some way to give our dogs the exercise and social time they need during the work week!

✅ Choose your providers wisely. Seek out the daycares run by true dog trainers or handlers who invest in behaviour/body language education for their staff and who will be honest with you about what’s going on. Seek out daycares who implement structured rest (dogs aren’t designed to be playing non stop all day long), who will rotate the dogs in and out as needed, and who maintain smaller group numbers well matched by both size AND needs. Seek out daycares where there’s more to do in their day than just fixate on the other dogs. Don’t be afraid to ask lots of questions and really do your homework - this seemingly small stuff can have lasting repercussions for you and your dog.

✅ Consider whether daycare is even the right choice for your dog at all. Some daycares CAN be great when done well with the right dogs and the right handlers, but for many dogs they will do better on structured walking services where they’re out there moving with purpose exploring the world vs the focus being just other dogs in a pen practicing problematic behaviours. We have some great options in Waipa and Hamilton which can be amazing for dogs who don’t suit a standard daycare situation.

✅ Learn to read your dogs body language. There is a lot of great content on this online, but things like rolling over and showing their belly, freezing in a stiff posture, getting the zoomies, rushing in at full speed, wide stress grins with pinned ears and excess wrinkles on their forehead etc can all be signs of a dog that is struggling a bit (depending on breed and context). Conversely, recognise when your dogs arousal levels are getting too high and take action to bring things down to more suitable levels. Be an advocate for dogs that they can rely on to take action to keep them safe when with you, and when reviewing content from their day at daycare.

✅ Make sure you are balancing any higher excitement interaction time with neutral experiences. Eg sometimes we go to the park and just do a quick training session or down stay then go home. Or we go play a little, then we do some training, then we might play some more. Often we go for a leash walk where we are not greeting any other dogs. Often we see another off lead dog and we’re just walking on by working on engagement. How much of this you will need to do will depend on your dog and how valuable they have found the dog interactions - higher drive dog people, you probably need to do a whole lot less “socialising” of your dog with others, and a lot more working with them.

Daycare is not a requirement of dog ownership. It’s 100% okay for your dog to get a solid walk and training session before and after work, and spend the day at home while you’re gone. If you choose to engage a daycare service, please ensure you are doing your due diligence checking them out to set your dog up for success. And if you spot behavioural issues developing during their time attending daycare, taking action sooner rather than later can make an enormous difference in how challenging it is to resolve the problem.

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Struggling with your dogs behaviour and this resonated with you? Owner coaching support is available throughout Hamilton and Waipa, NZ. 📧 hello@wolfedogs.nz